Hello! I’m Kimberly

I am passionate about helping people on their journey to find hope and healing from their past hurts so they can create the beautiful life they are destined to live!

I know what it is like to look in the mirror and hate the person that is reflecting back, to feel as if everything in your world is out of control, and to feel like you are broken beyond repair.

 My desire is to help you discover the tools you need to identify and transform the limiting beliefs that hold you back so you can become your happiest and most authentic self.  

I hope to help you discover how worthy, precious, and loved you truly are.

Finding Hope in the Darkness

A Journey of hopelessness and despair to one of joy and peace. 

Thank you for joining me here. My hope is that through reading my story, you will find encouragement and hope. My story is one of hope and triumph despite being riddled with anxiety and diagnosed with manic depression.

I’ve spent too many years of my life holding myself back from doing what I truly wanted to do because of shame, guilt, and the limiting beliefs that I held about myself. Instead of living life, life was what happened. My desire is for you to live your best possible life.

Grateful for the Healing Journey

Before I begin my story, I want to let you know that the relationship that I have with my parents today, is nothing like it was when I was growing up.  I absolutely love, adore, and respect both of them.  My parent’s relationship has also been restored and they have been married now for over 50 years.

My heart overflows with gratitude that they are my parents.  I tell you this because I want you to know that broken relationships can be restored.

With that said, I will begin my story.  I have been on a journey of healing my mind and soul for about the last 14 years and want to share with you some of the truths that I have discovered along the way.

Fear, Shame, Guilt, and Low self-esteem

For the majority of my life fear, shame, guilt, and low self-esteem plagued me.  These emotions dominated my life and determined how I made decisions.  I struggled with depression and anxiety. 

For so many years, I lived with a shame-based identity due to growing up in a dysfunctional home. Shame has a way of repeating itself from generation to generation. I am a byproduct of a dysfunctional family.  

The feeling of being imperfect, deeply flawed, and unlovable pushed me to earn and prove my worth to others.  Shame fueled my insecurities and perfectionism.  It propelled me to try harder to succeed and to seek the approval of others desperately. 

But shame did not play fair.  It continued to whisper lies.  With every lie I believed, the pain of never being enough sank deeper into my soul.

Sound familiar to you?  Well, my friend, sit back and discover how I went from a state of hopelessness and despair to one of joy and peace.  

My Beginning

I was born in a small town in Iowa when my parents were both 17 years old.  We moved to South Dakota when I was 2 years old.  My sister was born when I was about 5 years old.

Being the oldest child wasn’t the easiest job.  I was the one forging the way for my parents to figure out the “parenting” thing.  I now understand that they were parenting the best they could with the “tools” that they had.  They both had fears and strongholds that they were dealing with…all the while trying to raise two daughters and make a living.

My Teenage Years

A large part of my teen years were painful and difficult ones because of the shame and guilt that I carried in my soul .  I believe this was in large part because of growing up in a dysfunctional home.

There were anger outbursts, tension and fighting in our house.  Thankfully, there were also times of peace and calm.

My sister and I had a lot of sibling rivalry as we got older.  I resented my sister deeply because of the difference in the way I was treated as compared to her.  She was like my father and I was like my mother. 

Effects of Negative Words

Because my father resented my mother during those years, I felt like he treated me differently.  It felt at times that I was being punished for being like her.  

When he was upset with me, I would hear things like, “You’re just like your mother and I can’t stand her either” or “Why can’t you be like your sister?” 

Granted, I wasn’t the easiest child to raise.  My behavior as a teenager was very challenging.  During those years, I would describe myself as a very strong-willed, tenacious, and an independent thinker.  This was due to the negative words that were spoken to me and the false beliefs that I was forming about myself.   

Formation of Distorted Beliefs

Growing up as a child our family went to church. Our family attended a church that focused heavily on “rules”.

During those years, I formed many distortions about myself and God. To me, God was a distant “being” who was waiting for me to mess up so he could punish me just like my dad.  

For years I struggled to believe that God the Father could love me because I didn’t feel loved by my earthly father.  How could God love me when my own father didn’t show me love? I allowed my perception of Christianity to keep me from the love I so desperately wanted. 

Questioning Worth and Value

Unfortunately, I held on to that perception into my adult years. Though, despite my religious experiences, I felt empty and alone.  There seemed to be something missing. 

Subsequently, that led me to believe that I was unlovable and that my life had no purpose.  The thought that I was a mistake, a burden, and a dirty piece of trash tormented me day after day. 

Looking in a mirror was extremely painful because I hated the person that was reflecting back at me.  I felt like I was damaged goods and broken beyond repair.

I truly believed that I was:

• stupid
• unattractive
• a failure
• a bad person
• a phony
• selfish
• not enough
• that I didn’t matter
• was defective and inadequate
• that I shouldn’t have been born
• unlovable

I wrestled with feelings of insecurity and self hatred and because of it… I made poor decisions.  Those poor decisions only created more shame.  On and on the spiral continued.

Seeking Validation

Because my family was stuck in the shame-based cycle, I did not receive the validation for who I was.  My teenage emotions were met with frustration and anger.

At times, it felt like I was being rejected and criticized for not being enough by my parents.  Because of this perception, even more shame flooded my mind and soul. 

I acted out as a test to see if my parents loved me.  To my dismay, I failed at my attempts.  The result was more shame.   All I wanted was to know that I was worthy, accepted, and lovable.

Unfortunately, my attempts to prove to myself that I was lovable by my parents was only met with contempt.  So I went searching in different places.  That search only created more insecurity, shame, and guilt.

Carried Distorted Beliefs into Adult Years

Shame deeply imprinted my heart with the belief that I was unworthy, rejected, and unlovable. For so many years I lived in this shame-based identity.  It encompassed every aspect of my life. 

Unfortunately, I carried those distorted beliefs with me into my adult years.  Many decisions throughout my life were made because of my false identity.

I continued to struggle to believe that I was beautiful, worthy of love and acceptance, and that my life had purpose for many years.  There were numerous situations and experiences over the years that continually confirmed the belief as truth in my mind.  What I didn’t understand at the time was that there is a difference between belief and truth. 

Tucked Shame and Guilt Away

Even though the things I believed about myself were not true facts about me, I held them as truth in my mind.  Many of my decisions in life were based on these “truths” which only lead to more pain and suffering.  I so desperately wanted to be loved and accepted but was never able to find it.

For so many years I tucked my shame and guilt deep down in the dark space of my soul.  I built up walls to protect myself.  People I loved were held at a distance for fear of being rejected.  

I had received the message, during my childhood and teenage years, that I was too much of this and not enough of that. It felt like God made a mistake when I was created. 

Deep in my soul, I feared people wouldn’t like the real me. Because I so desperately needed people to like me, I became like a chameleon.  I became the person they wanted me to be. I lost my true self to the facade I created so that others would accept me and like me.

Shame Kept Me a Prisoner

Shame has a way of preventing you from being your true self.  You believe in the idea of “needing to be who you think you should be” which affects what you are willing to show others.  It doesn’t help that there is an endless tape replaying over and over in your mind, reminding you what you are and what you are not.

Shame kept me a prisoner in my own mind.

Because I did not deal with my shame-based identity, it led to anger, depression, an eating disorder, and addiction.  It also caused:

• low self-esteem
• anxiety
• irrational guilt
• perfectionism
• codependency
• an inability to have healthy relationships

Shame fueled my depression for many years.  It seemed that no matter what I tried to do to alleviate it, depression just wouldn’t leave me alone.  I tried to be super involved in sports, school activities, work, church activities, and spending time with others.  I even turned to alcohol to try to numb the pain of depression.  But to no avail…it had its grip on me and wasn’t letting go.

Learn more about a shame-based identity– Healing the Past –  Tearing Down the Walls of a Shame-based Identity

Shame Fueled Perfectionism

Because I felt imperfect, deeply flawed, and unlovable, it pushed me to earn and prove my worth to others.  Shame fueled my perfectionism as well.  In desperation, it forced me to try harder to succeed and to seek the approval of others. 

In countless ways my perfectionism served me well.  I was a good student in school and worked hard for A’s. I had a successful business and career as a preschool teacher, teaching child development classes for adult learners, and teaching classes at Early Childhood conferences.  There is a box full of certificates and plaques for the countless hours spent trying to produce the best possible work.

In other ways, my perfectionism was detrimental for my life. Perfectionism was my excuse for unreasonably high standards for myself, for never being satisfied with achievements, and for my unquenchable drive for approval.  I convinced myself that whatever I did…  it had to be better than anyone else.

Quest for Validation

I was on a constant quest for validation through my behavior and performance.

Approval from others was desperately needed for me to feel worthy.  That desire drove me to obsess over reaching extreme measures of achievement.  Even though on the outside I appeared to have it all together, on the inside I was crumbling and afflicted with anxiety.

I was trying to control all the things around me because I felt like there was  a tornado raging inside me.  Perfectionism pushed me to put immense pressure on myself… striving for unattainable standards.  The quest to be a “perfect” person led to self-destructive behaviors and resulted in a life of unhappiness and loneliness.

Perfectionism and comparison almost destroyed me.  The weight of the anxiety and pressure to perform also prevented me from feeling fully alive and engaging in an authentic life.

Read about my journey to overcome perfectionism and comparison – How To Overcome Perfectionism and 5 Steps to Stop Playing the Comparison Game and Shame and Guilt Destroyed – Hope Restored

Insecurity and Self-hatred Caused Poor Life Decisions

When I was a little girl I always dreamed of being a princess.  I imagined a handsome prince would someday whisk me away and we would live happily ever after.  I think to some extent or another every little girl dreams of their happily ever after.

My fairytale dream was nothing like that. My insecurity and self-hatred caused me to make poor life decisions.  Which led me to marry a narcissist.  

After a very difficult break up with a boyfriend that I thought was “the one”, I met “George”. When I first met him, I didn’t like him at all and I found him quite annoying. But apparently, he liked me.

He constantly asked me out on a date. And every time… I said no. After being pestered for so long, I finally relented and said yes. I thought this would be a way to get him to leave me alone.

For some reason, he was able to wear me down. We went out on a few more dates. Then less than a month after the first date, he proposed.

Discover the traits of a narcissist – There is love on the other side of healing from emotional abuse

Following Fear instead of Logic

My dream of being unconditionally loved and married blinded my perspective.  The desire to be loved was so powerful that I threw all logic out the window.  I ignored red flags and proceeded down the path that almost ended my life.

Within 3 months of him proposing to me, we were married.  It is amazing what fear will cause you to do.  I decided to marry a man that I really didn’t like, let alone love.  I married him so that I would appear to be loved.  

My thought was if I was wearing a wedding ring I would tell the world that I WAS LOVABLE!  Perception is everything…. right?  Little did I know that one fateful decision would create a gaping hole in my heart and almost cost me my life. 

Married Life

Our marriage started out good.  He was wonderful to me.  I thought that maybe I could learn to love him.  Though everything changed when he realized that I was not able to have children.

He wanted to have children and so did I. So we decided to start trying to have children. I thought that having children would fill up the emptiness that I was feeling. 

Month after month I wasn’t able to get pregnant.  I went to the Dr. to find out why I couldn’t get pregnant.

My doctor told me that I was not able to bear my own children because of scarring from a procedure to remove cysts when I was a teenager.  Just another blow to my nonexistent self worth.  I was even more inadequate than I thought I was.

The Beginning of the Misery to Come

That was the beginning of the misery to come. His behavior and attitude towards me changed.  He no longer treated me like I was special.  I was now treated as the problem.  That’s when the emotional abuse began. 

The man that professed to love, cherish, and honor me abandoned his commitment. The emotional abuse started out so small.  It slowly progressed from sarcastic comments to razor sharp words that edged my fears and insecurities deeper within my heart.

Little by little, the assault on my mind and emotions was causing my identity, self worth, and dignity to slowly become annihilated. 

Every hate-filled piercing word sliced deeper and deeper into my already wounded soul.  The abuse created havoc on my mental health as well.  It felt like my soul was being shattered into a million pieces.  

Diagnosed with Anxiety and Manic Depression.

After less than a year of marriage, I was diagnosed with anxiety and manic depression. The emotional abuse caused my brain to become chemically unbalanced. The doctors had told me that this “state of being” is how I would live for the rest of my life.

Over the next year and a half, I was hospitalized 3 times in mental health hospitals.  I struggled to “pull myself up by the bootstraps” as people suggested I should do.  

All the while, no one knew the real reason why I was struggling with my mental health.  Though, every time I was hospitalized, the distorted beliefs I held about myself fell deeper and deeper into my soul. 

Unseen Wounds

The result from the emotional abuse also caused me to sink even deeper into depression, shame and guilt.  Unlike a physical wound, no one could see the marks of my invisible wounds. I struggled with things like:

• panic attacks
• restlessness
• confusion
• difficulty making decision
• difficulty with focus and concentration
• feelings of worthlessness and hopelessness
• self-blame
• self-destructiveness
• lack of motivation
• low self-esteem

Lost Will to Live

As the emotional abuse increased, I lost more and more of my will to live.  The wounds within my heart and mind were so vast and deep, I felt that they are never going to heal.

Consequently, I came to a point where I had decided the only way for my inner pain and turmoil to go away was for me to go away.  I tried to commit suicide 2 times to end the misery, pain, and despair.

After I failed the 2nd attempt, I was convinced that I was truly a failure.  I couldn’t even kill myself.  A few days later, I realized that I failed at killing myself for some reason.  Even though I was still drowning in my pit of pain, I somehow knew this was the beginning of my breakthrough… and held on to it tightly. 

After this realization, I knew that it was by the power of grace that I was saved both times.  After I failed at ending my life the 2nd time I declared, “God, I do not know how and I don’t know when, but someway….. somehow I believe you are going to pull me out of this pit I am in.”

Discovered a Loving Father

Fortunately, after the suicide attempts, I discovered that God wasn’t a distant “being,” but a loving father who wanted a relationship with me.  He wanted to be my best friend.  The emptiness that I felt before was now being filled up with my relationship with Jesus. 

I would love to tell you that my life got better after that, but unfortunately, the emotional and physical abuse escalated and intensified.  

If you want to learn more about having a personal relationship like I have with my best friend – Let Faith Arise

Physical Abuse Escalates

We were living in the same town as my parents at the time.  He decided that we needed to move to a different town because my parents were too involved in our lives. So we moved hours away from my family.  That is when the physical abuse began.  

Because he had successfully removed me from my support system, he felt safe enough to show all his true colors. Just like the emotional abuse, the physical abuse also progressed slowly. It began with a push… to being choked… to finally him trying to kill me.

The abuse had got to the point where I never knew if I would live to see another day.  The fear and uncontrollable negative emotions caused an avalanche of anxiety and it paralyzed me in anxiety and depression. 

No one ever dreams that their knight in shining armor would hurl hate-filled words at them, or injure them physically, inflict emotional abuse and fear, or even betray them with another woman.  That is what I got instead of my happily ever after.

Why I Didn’t Leave

You are probably wondering why I didn’t leave when the physical abuse began.  I used to wonder the same thing about other women who were in this type of situation before my experience.

Fear… plain and simple.  I was told repeatedly that if I left, he would find me and bring me back… dead or alive. I was convinced that he would follow through with his threat.

Not only did I fear that he would come after me if I left, he had also convinced me to believe that I could not survive on my own.  The emotional abuse brainwashed me into believing that I was dependent upon him for just existing.  

My Knight Rescued Me

It felt like there was no hope in sight.  The only reason I didn’t contemplate suicide again was due to the belief that someway.. somehow, my Jesus was going to rescue me from the pit that I was in.  And he did rescue me again. 

Just like when Jesus showed up and rescued me from suicide, he rescued me from my husband’s attempt to kill me. As my world started crashing in on me, I knew deep in my soul that everything was going to be okay.  

The Power of Three Principles

Thankfully, I was able to escape from my abusive husband, despite his repeated threats that I would never leave alive. Though the stress of not knowing how or when he would come for me caused even more stress and anxiety.

I was very fortunate to meet a psychiatrist named Dr. Bill Pettit (Dr. Pettit’s website) after I escaped from my abuser. He was able to help me cope with the stress and anxiety. He also taught me about the Three Principles and the power of my thoughts.

Through the knowledge I gained from learning the Three Principles (mind, consciousness, and thought), I was also able to get off all the medication I was on from the previous doctors. Once I really applied the Three Principles into my life, I was able to have a higher levels of happiness, peace, and contentment.

Here is the philosophy on which the Three Principles – Principles of Mind, Consciousness and Thought – is based. Sydney Banks believed that a person doesn’t need to simply focus on awareness and ways of coping with emotions, but instead on understanding the nature and power of our thoughts, and the ability to have positive experiences regardless of our circumstances.  In essence, he believed that once a person has an awareness of a painful memory, they have the ability to allow the thoughts to pass through without being held captive to the painful emotions.

Learn more about the Three Principles – Three Principles Foundation

Negative Thoughts Continued to Control Me

For years I struggled with debilitating negative thoughts that controlled every aspect of my life.  Through counseling, I realize that I was the cause for the belief system that I had established in my mind.

Dr. Petit taught me that we control the thoughts we think and believe.  If we do not purposefully reprogram our minds, it will naturally go to our “default” way of thinking.

Bound Up in My Own Shackles

Unfortunately, my “default” was negative thoughts.  It is hard to believe that I allowed my own mind to beat me up and destroy me.  It would be great to tell you that I quickly applied his techniques and stuck to them…. but I didn’t.

I kept getting bound up in my own shackles.  It was like I would unlock one false distortion and then another one would pop up.  I would then take back the false distortion that I just unlocked and place it back in my thoughts.  My mind was a hot mess.

Not only was my mind a hot mess, but my physical body was also being greatly affected. I was experiencing:

• Headaches
• Stomach issues
• Muscle aches and pains
• Fatigue
• Sleeping issues
• Chest pain
• Back pain
• Adrenal issues
• Loss of appetite

Read about the steps that I took to overcome negative thoughts – Overcoming Negative Thinking

Hopelessness and Despair Overwhelmed Me

The number of times that I would lay on my bed and cry is more than I would like to count.  I wanted the thoughts to stop but I just didn’t seem to have the strength to overcome them.  Hopelessness, despair, and a feeling of being powerless overwhelmed me.  Even though I would pray and ask Jesus to help me…. the thoughts would continue to hold me captive.

What I didn’t realize was that I was trying to overcome the thoughts on my own strength.  I needed the anchor that holds my soul together… the one who brings peace within the storm… the hope that never fails… I needed to surrender it to Jesus.  What I needed was for Him to empower me to overcome these unhealthy thought patterns and habits.

Valuable Realization

It was during the process of becoming whole mind, body, and spirit that I finally realized that I cannot overcome the negative thoughts and “demons” within my own mind.  Not that I thought that I was possessed but some of the thoughts in my head were pure evil.  Especially the ongoing thoughts of suicide.  Some of you may totally understand what I am talking about.

As I was walking through my healing process, I came to a place where I had to decide if I was going to stay were I was… in my pit of despair and misery… or was I going to allow my Jesus to come to my rescue.  I chose to surrender my heart, my hurts, my dysfunction, and every broken piece of my soul to Jesus.

I found hope when I put my trust in Jesus to heal my mind.   It was not an easy thing to do since I had thrived on being in control.  How do I give up control to someone I cannot see?  What I discovered was that when I surrendered control… I gained control over my life.

Decision Time

Because I chose to surrender my pain and suffering, I discovered how much I was loved unconditionally by my Father in Heaven.  I also recognized my worth and value comes from Him and not anywhere else.  I discovered that He is my source of strength and hope, there is power in His name, and that I am enough because I am His child created in His image.

Thankfully, Jesus lowered the ladder into my dark pit and I climbed out.  One step at a time, He set me free from beliefs that I held onto as “truths”.  He set me free from lies and revealed the truth to me.  One by one I was set free from the chains that bound my mind.

 All my life I searched and searched for that one elusive thing to fill me up.  Each and every time what I thought was going to fill me only left me with a deeper void.

I am happy to say that I finally found what I was looking for.  You see there is only one thing can fill that emptiness. That one thing is Jesus.  It is through a personal relationship with Jesus that I found “completeness”.

If you want to learn more about having a personal relationship like I have with my best friend- Let Faith Arise

Finding Hope and Triumph Over Obstacles

That was decades ago now.  During the last ten plus years, I have learned a lot about myself and others as I traveled along the journey of healing my body, soul, and mind.  Even though it has been a bumpy and challenging ride, it is a story about finding hope and triumph over obstacles, from mental illness, and breaking free from my distorted view of myself. 

There were several things I discovered through the process of this journey.

• I realized the power of my thoughts and that not every thought that comes into my mind is true regardless of how “true” it feels. 
• Learning to extend forgiveness was another tool that assisted in my healing.   
• Discovering my true identity was also a breakthrough for me.  My identity is now based on who I am in Jesus.  I am a daughter of the King, worthy, precious, wanted, and adored.  

Jesus took my pain and suffering when he bore my sins on the cross.  I no longer needed to hang on to it. 

Chains of Fear, Shame, Guilt, and Low Self-esteem Broken

The chains of fear, shame, guilt, and low self-esteem were broken through my personal relationship with Jesus Christ.  Through his act of love on the cross, Jesus declared me (and you) more than enough.  

His death and resurrection destroyed the power of my shame and guilt forever.  I discovered the depth of his love and the power of his name was all I needed to be whole.

Once I surrendered my heart, my hurts, and all the broken pieces of my soul to Jesus, I found a feeling of true inner peace and joy.  I realized that no matter what has happened in the past, I was still worthy, lovable, and accepted.  

My worth and value comes from him and not anywhere else.  Regardless of how I view myself, my father in Heaven sees me as a precious gift.  I am loved unconditionally.   

Please go to my Let Faith Arise page if you want to know more about having a personal relationship with God.

Living Life Intentionally

I have made a conscious decision to live my life intentionally… in alignment with my values, goals, dreams, and morals. Living life on purpose, for a purpose helps me focus on where I want to go in life. It also prevents me from getting stuck in the comparison trap.  Now, I can focus on what really matters in life and believe that I matter in life.

I have discovered that comparing yourself to others really isn’t about the other person… it is really about your own insecurities.  The choice is mine if I want to stay in the comparison mindset or accept that my present circumstances are good enough.

My Life Now

Fortunately, I am no longer bound to prescription drugs to balance my brain chemically.  Thankfully, it has been over twenty-two years since I have needed to take those drugs.  

I live a life free of fear, shame, guilt, and low self-esteem.  Please don’t get me wrong: I still have days when I feel condemned, disqualified, and overwhelmed. 

The difference now is that I no longer hang out and agree with those feelings. When those negative emotions come knocking at the door of my mind, I acknowledge them and realize that I have the power to choose if I allow them in.  The only power those emotions have over me is the power I give them. 

Read about the steps I took to overcome shame and guilt – Shame and Guilt Destroyed – Hope Restored

Knowing Who I Am

I know who I am in Christ Jesus and refuse to be beaten up by my emotions.  My hope and strength come from the Lord, the Maker of Heaven, and Earth.  I am in charge of how I feel.  No one is responsible for my happiness but me. 

Looking back on my life, it amazes me how far I have come since my teenage years.  I am so grateful for the beautiful and fulfilling life I have now.  

There are times though that I wish I could go back and visit the doctors who told me that I would never be free from anxiety and manic depression.  I would love to show them how wrong they were. 

There is Hope and Healing Available for You

If you are struggling to believe that you will never be free from low self-esteem, shame, guilt, anxiety, depression, or any other mental illness issues, take heart.  If I was able to overcome these obstacles and mental illness, therefore, you could overcome it as well.  Take a hold of the hand of Jesus because he is the anchor of peace and healing.

Choose to center your identity in who Christ says you are.  For you, my precious friend, are….

• beautiful
• a gift from Heaven
• wanted
• worthy of love
• precious
• more than enough
• loved

You can find your happily ever after, too.  You do not need to live in fear, guilt, or shame.  God’s plans for you are good.  Unfortunately, our choices in life have sometimes kept us from the good God has for us.

If you want to learn more about having a personal relationship like I have with my best friend – Let Faith Arise

We are not bad people… we just have made some bad choices.  Therefore, there is always hope and healing for the taking.  The key is taking action. Choose to walk down the path of healing and restoration.  You are worth it!

Dreams Do Come True

I know there is love on the other side of healing from emotional and physical abuse because I found a true prince charming. Today, I am happily remarried over twenty-three years, with three beautiful children.  

My healing from mental illness and my distorted belief system has come about because I refused to be held captive in my mind by negative thoughts.  Embracing who I am in Jesus Christ and being willing to work through the pain of my past also assisted in the healing process. Life is overflowing with possibilities now.   

Through the process of this healing journey, my relationship with my parents and sister has been restored.  I am beyond grateful for the beautiful relationship I have with them.

Oh… If you remember, I was told years ago by my doctor that I was unable to deliver my own children.  Well, that doctor was wrong as well.  God had a different plan.

Outlook on Life Drastically Improved

My outlook on life has drastically improved since I started the journey of healing.  I no longer believe the lie:

• I”m not beautiful
• I’m not worthy of love and acceptance
• My life has no purpose or meaning
• If people really knew that real me… they wouldn’t like me
• I don’t deserve good things to happen to me
• I am a piece dirty trash… fat… ugly… stupid
• My personality is wrong
• I am a mistake… worthless… flawed… a failure
• Need to be perfect
• I can’t ask for help… I shouldn’t need help
• If I ask for anything, I’ll be a burden… and they won’t want me anymore  
• I’m a terrible wife/mother/friend

It is not out of vain that I don’t believe these things anymore.  It is due to where I find my worth and that is in my Heavenly Father.  My desire is that you, too, come to that place of loving yourself for who you are.

When I think back to the discoveries that I have made along my path to healing, I am reminded how far I have come in this process.  I am so grateful for the healing power of my Father in Heaven.

Can you relate to any of the lies that I found freedom from?  You too can be set free from beliefs that you hold onto as “truths”.  Read how I found freedom – You Are More then Enough

Sharing Discoveries With Younger Me

If I wrote a letter to a younger me about the lessons that I have learned it would say…

Dear Younger Me, 

There are so many life lessons that I have learned over the years.  I want to share them with you so that you can live life to the fullest… not allowing fear, doubt, and insecurity from keeping you from all you were created to be.

First, and foremost, you are worthy of love.  Just because you may not be receiving it from those who should love you the most does not determine how lovable you are. 

You are loved because your Father in Heaven created you on purpose.. for a purpose.  His love for you is unconditional and extravagant.  There is nothing you can do to separate yourself from His love.

You have the power to control what thoughts stay in your mind.  Just because you hear those negative voices in your mind does not mean that they are speaking the truth. 

The truth is, you are……

Beautiful…

More than enough…

Smart…

Funny..

Not a mistake…

Not broken…

Worthy of good things…

You are not a failure…

Your worth surpasses all earthly things…

You do not need to be perfect in all that you do.  It is OK to make mistakes.  You will never grow and develop if you stay in that place of fearing failure.  How you deal with the failures is more important than failing.

You always have choices.  Even when you procrastinate and do not make a choice… you made a choice.  Accept what is, let go of what was, and have faith in what will be.

Your joy is not determined by your circumstances.  Happiness is an inside job.  No one can make you happy.  Look within yourself, not to others, to find peace and contentment.

Do not compare yourself to others and resist the temptation to judge them.  Each person is on their own journey with different gifts and talents.  Embrace the unique you!

Take care of yourself… mind, body, and soul.  You cannot do your very best when you are running in ten different directions.  Doing more doesn’t make you a better person… it just wears you out.

Do not allow fear, anxiety, and insecurities to dictate your decisions.  The only power these things have over you is the power you give it.  What you focus on expands in your mind.  Focus on what is good.

You are worthy of good things in your life.  Your past does not determine your future.  Just because you made mistakes does not make you a bad person.  Choose not to sabotage the good things in your life.  

Not everyone will like you and that is OK.  That does not change how lovable or likable you are.  Seek the approval of your Father in Heaven rather than from people… He is the only one that really counts.

Disappointments come when you place your expectations on people.  You cannot expect people to act and respond the way you do.  We were all created differently.

You are not a mistake.  The way you look, your personality, and how you think is all of God’s design.  He didn’t make a mistake when He created you.  You were created the way you are on purpose… for a purpose.

You have the power to control your emotions.  They do not have to control you.  No one can make you feel a certain way.  You choose to feel that way.  Choose wisely.

Being successful is more than just an accumulation of money and things.  You can have all the money and things you want in life and truly not be happy.  Success comes when you can find happiness and purpose in your life.   

Your past mistakes cannot separate you from God’s love and acceptance.  There is nothing that can separate you from the love of Jesus Christ.  His love for you is unconditional.  He loves you simply because He created you.

Forgiveness is a very powerful thing.  Not only should you forgive others, but you need to forgive yourself.  You do not need to live in shame and regret.

And last, but not least, Jesus wants to have a personal relationship with you.  He wants you to experience the true peace and love that comes from knowing Him.

His love for you is deeper than any ocean.  You do not need to strive for it or try to earn it.  You simply have to receive it.  It is yours for the taking.

Most importantly, as you ponder these thoughts know that no matter what you have done past, present, or future God’s plans for you are good.  His promise is that He will work all things for the good. 

So even if you have already made some poor choices in life know that you are never too far from the hand of God.  All you have to do is reach out your hand and He will meet you where you are… because He loves you.

With much love, 

Me

Living Free of Limiting Beliefs and Mental Illness

I am so excited to see what the next decade brings. Living free of limiting beliefs and mental illness has given me the freedom to become all that I was created to be.  My desire is for you to find hope and healing so you too, can become all that you were created to be.  You deserve to live a beautiful and fulfilling life just like me. 

Through all of this, I have found a platform of hope and healing for others.  For the last 7+ years I have been mentoring and encouraging people to become the best version of themselves.  

Consequently, it all began after my healing started to take place in my mind and soul.  As I walked down the path of healing, I realized that other people may be stuck in “ false truths” as well. So I decided to share what I was learning with others.

Crazy as it may sound, I am so very grateful for each and every one of those painful situations because of the good that is coming from it today.  Therefore, I honestly wouldn’t want to change a thing.

Can You Relate?

If you can relate to the issues I talked about, then you are in the right place.  I share a wealth of information that I have discovered through my process of healing and restoration at my blog – Gracefully Living Life Loved.  Together we can take a journey that will help you become the best version of you.

Question for you….have you been on your own journey to wholeness?  What discoveries have you made?  I would love to hear about it and it just might help someone else too.

Let the healing begin!

With much love,

Read more about me, my discoveries, and get more encouragement

A book that you may find very helpful in understanding how worthy and precious you truly are is called Captivating.  This is the book that really helped me break free from the negative thought patterns.

Because I strongly I believe in this book, I have given hundreds of them away to women who would benefit from it.